the Right to Leave
Help Sonia file her Motion of Appeal
On this page you will find all of the details of Sonia's story mentioned in the gofundme as well as information on TRTL advocacy, resources & links.
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For a brief overview of the extraordinary injustice that has brought about the need to ask for this help, you can hear from Sonia in this video. Or if you prefer you can keep reading below. A longer version of the story is further down.
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The primary goal of this page is to get Sonia the help she needs to protect herself and her daughter. She has until October 23rd to raise enough funds to pay for the pre-quisites needed to file her appeal. (Yes, even though she is self-representing in court, she still has massive fees to pay - a discriminatory road block that keeps victims away from justice, which she intends to address in the advocacy that is further down the page).
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In addition to desperately needed funds to access the justice she needs, this page is also a plea to find someone to advocate for her, someone that knows the system, that has some power and can help protect what she has left and bring some justice to the situation.
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You can read the Coles notes of the situation on the gofundme page, you will see a list off all the needs there.
If you want to hear directly from Sonia, you can watch the video she posted on Linkedin below. There are more details in the videos that will follow as she builds out the advocacy. But first she needs to protect herself and her daughter.
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The secondary goal of this page is the beginning of Sonia's journey into advocacy and supporting other victim-survivors of post-separation abuse that is facilitated by our violent court systems. Our family 'justice' system systemically supports and protects narcissistic abusers & their enablers ensuring that they can continue to abuse their victims for years and decades after they leave.
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Sonia believes that what advocacy should be fundamentally fighting for, is the right for victims to leave - to not be forced into a dangerously vulnerable relationship with the person they already escaped from. Abuse of a parent is abuse of a child, period. Children depend on the safe parent, the more you damage the victim, the more you rob the child of the best parent they could have. The science is clear on this: co-regulation and the basics of brain and nervous system development of a young child has already provided ample evidence and knowledge to show that any harm that comes to the victim parent has a direct impact on the child. (more on that to come in the advocacy)
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IMPORTANT: There is no legal advice on this page. At this moment Sonia is in no position to support other victims except through what is on this page (resources and links below) and with what she will be posting at @therighttoleave. Soon she will start up "Hold on to your Nervous System" which will be a regular group course on supporting your nervous system during times of extreme fear and duress, which victim survivors caught up in the courts live in constantly. She will be in better shape down the road and be able to support over victims in this way.
The information on this is about one case in the Manitoba court system. Sonia is not recommending that other victims follow in her footsteps at this time. Telling one's story can create a lot of danger and expose the victim and their children to backlash and an escalation of abuse by individuals involved and also by the systems that are supposed to protect them. Sonia is not doing this to encourage others to tell their story at this time. She is in a unique position to fight by telling her story because the courts have already taken her livelihood, blocked her ability to access healthcare, thereby taking her health away from her and court ordering her into poverty - she has only one thing left to lose. Given the trajectory of recent events she knows she will lose even more if she does not fight, there has already been an escalation and the risk has already increased over the last year, so there is no choice, only two options exist now. 1. Do nothing and lose the last of what has not yet been taken from her. Or, 2. Do something and have at least have a small chance at safety and a future.
Sonia is telling her story as an act of self-defence against years of harassment, threats, intimidation to keep her silent, an unethical custody assessor and a biased court that seems to prefer the opinion of that unethical professional over the evidence plainly in front of them.
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The telling of more stories for other victims will come later - in a safe supported way down the road as Sonia moves more fully into advocacy to help other victims across Canada win back the right to leave abusive relationships. "The Right to Leave" will focus on demanding that the justice system do its job properly and stop protecting abusers and perpetrators at the expense of the victims. It will also tackle the obvious collusion that is systemic throughout the system.
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As it stands right now, our courts force victims to stay in close relationship with their abuser after they leave, exposing them to years of more abuse, causing them and their children great harm. Our courts have a habit of supporting abuser via a psuedo-science called 'parental alienation theory' and often hand the children to the abuser. (The United Nations has condemned this, calling it a human rights violation - more on this down the page)
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Back to our first focus right now - the clock is already counting down the days to the deadline to file her appeal - Sonia needs to raise a minimum of $4500 to file her appeal. As of Oct 10th, she has two weeks left to raise the funds. Please consider clicking on the gofundme link below and help her today. And please share the gofundme and Sonia's story on social media.
If you are not in a position to contribute to the fund, all the other easy ways that you can help and show support are also listed in links below.
About Sonia
Sonia was born and raised in Southern Manitoba. After high school she left to see the world and have adventures. With that mission in mind she quit in her second year of university where she was studying biology & music, to tour with her band, winning songwriter and performance awards she eventually landed in Toronto for that publishing deal that fell through, you know, back when Napster killed the video star :)
A few years later Sonia went back to school to study nutrition and became a Registered Nutritional Therapist. Her first 4 years of work experience were in New York, London, The Middle East and Ottawa. She moved back to Manitoba 10 years after she left, started The Whole Avocado and has been counselling individuals, creating collaborative healthcare events, and keynoting conferences, ever since...
...well, she was doing that until all of these awful things happened to her.
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This, my friends, is not a case of 'high conflict' this is not a 'messy divorce' or a 'custody battle', this is intentional and malicious bullying and post-separation abuse which is encouraged and facilitated by our dysfunctional and violent family court system. Special mention goes to the non-accountable unethical professionals that work within that system.
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Sonia's situation is an all-systems fail in Manitoba and she needs our help to get back what the courts have taken from her: her career and business, her health and her and her daughter's safety. She needs support to gain strength and capacity to earn a full income again and to be able to fight now.